Toilet paper seems to be the latest environmental guilt trip, judging by this piece in the Chronicle of Higher Education:

http://chronicle.com/review/brainstorm/article/?id=1239&utm_source=at&utm_medium=en

The funniest part of this comes from one of the comments posted in response:

"Seriously, the toilet paper problem would be solved if we used just one square of toilet paper, the way that my brother learned from the Marines. Impossible? No, simply take one square, fold it in half twice to make a smaller square, tear off the folded corner, open up the larger piece that now has a hole in it, insert your finger, clean yourself, flush the square, and then unfold the small piece you tore off. Use it to clean your fingernail."

 Guess I won't be shaking hands with any Marines anytime soon.

My idea: Quit being a whiner. Who needs toilet paper? Use corn cobs.